maintaining goals I have set for myself has always been a struggle with me. I don't want to think of myself as lazy (though I'm not ruling it out), but I find it incredibly hard to do something without a payoff. The things I do do for money I end up inevitably resenting due to the monotony of it, and any time I try to do something for myself, I tend to just lose passion in it, leaving myself just disappointed in myself.

The biggest issue is that I hate doing nothing even more, but I just can't seem to bring myself to do anything except for one or two week bursts.